Day 12 Cold and Wet

The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.

Dolly Parton

A little apology for yesterday, it was a spectacularly cynical blog.

I am honestly positive right now which, trust me, hurts every sarcastic bone in my body. So, for the most part, this is working. Day 12, almost two weeks of positivity, and I am Positive. This isn't to say I'm in a state of permanent bliss BUT thinking I should be positive and sampling bite-size portions of positivity methodology is working! No matter how exorbitant, mentally unsound, desultory they can be.... and just like last Sunday, I'm not going to have a 'day off'.

REGARDLESS of that... a little bit of cosmic ordering later, plus a bit of sacrificial veg action, and yesterday was to be honest not the best and I felt, on the whole, uninspired. Got me wondering about how motivational speakers, like Kris MBE, stay so positive all the time. DO they? Surely they drop that little baton of convivial joy from time to time? Almost in a flash of inspiration I thought of that 90s GOD of positivity, Mr. Motivator. Firstly, what's he up to now, and is he still the bundle of lycra clad energy he was back in the day?? Real name Derrick Evans, the motivational guru resides in Jamaica and currently presides over an ecotourism resort, H'Evans Scent (??) and Jamaica's very first Paintball operation, PaintSplat. I love this!! I fully intend to visit H'Evans Scent, right after the 'notorios' Hedonism Resort in the northern part of the Island.

So, as demonstrated by Derrick, there's a physical aspect to Being Positive - exercise obviously helps, neon pink leotard optional. In addition, there's a whole heap of science demonstrating that positive & happy thinking - psychological state of mind - can lead to physiological benefits. Just this month the University of Columbia released fresh evidence that people of a sunnier disposition are less likely to develop heart disease.

Today I'm going to stick with Pantheism. It's the last day of the Week of Isms, I'm in the countryside, and I feel like having a little one-on-one time with Mother Nature. For today I will believe, wholeheartedly, in the 'all-encompassing unity and "sacredness" of Nature'. Right after I've piled on approx 20 layers of waterproof clothing and stashed some whiskey about my person (keeping up the Druid tradition obviously). There's a 'technique', albeit very very abstract, in archaeology called phenomenology, which is essentially the concept of 'being' in a landscape - hearing, seeing, and smelling a site instead of merely studying it on a map. It is extremely subjective, and usually highly criticized. BUT I'm gonna put it to the test and experience landscape, connect to nature, and eventually worship the god of Hot Baths.

Day 11 Lunatic Fringe

Ok meditation works and it’s good… am very much a ‘newbie’ and struggling immensely with ‘emptying the mind of clutter’ mostly because when I focus on an empty mind it fills with the most irritating clutter such as ‘what is an empty mind?’ and ‘is it empty yet? is it??'

Emptying my mind of clutter however, does not correspond to all my random thoughts about cosmology. I know this isn’t an ism... am building up to that. My thoughts on cosmology are largely to do with my current location. Today I am in deepest Wiltshire, checkin' out some stones.

SO, on the lines of cosmology, I’ve been dying to return to Noel Edmonds. Noel, of house and deal fame, openly and enthusiastically endorses The Cosmic Ordering Service. Feeling stuck in a rut, those hedonistic Golden Years over, Noel stumbled across a best-selling German book by Barbel Mohr about the power of positive thinking. Basically, from what I can gather, you think about what you really really want and 'place an order' for it with the universe. Ahem. Mohr is very open about the extent to which this is synonymous with a mail order company.

BUT! When challenged on precisely who in the universe deals with such requests, Mohr is a tad more vague. And there’s no mention of what would be my first question to her – HOW do you contact the universe?? Is this covered in my Vodafone inclusive minutes? This eventually, thank gawd, aligns itself with an actual theory: united field theory. UFT basically asserts that everything is one and you can connect with the concept, or power, of the entirety. Yes, you place the order with yourself. Mohr goes on to suggest that we all order subconsciously anyway, so what makes this so special?? Well, you can order for other people. Combined as one in the entirety, we are so connected to each other I can call the universe on behalf of friends.

Er, ok, so the general idea is that if enough people wish positive thoughts for themselves and others, the universe will contain more positive energy. Haha. Mohr you’re a crazy fool! Only you’re NOT, you’re just like every other person abusing societal insecurities and the demand for self-help books – exceptionally clever.

Inspired by TCOS, I’m going to spend some time on the lunatic fringe.

Today's ism is: Druidism

Druidism was the religion of Celtic people. Neo-druidism is the religion of Interesting Characters. Well it's not really a religion, more a form of spirituality. And then it's not really that either, more a philosophy of living. Meh. Essentially, as far as neo-druidism is concerned, it should probs be classed under escapism, or romanticism, or delusionism. I am SO getting the hang of this. Despite the slight hint of cynicism here, I am actually pleasantly surprised by elements of neo-druidism – it’s very tolerant, can be monotheist, polytheist or animist (belief in spirits). Like a theological pick’n’mix!

And then there’s the whole ‘magic’ concept! Ha. Because of course there was magic back in the day, of course. Until those pesky Roman’s snuck in and snuffed it out. The concept of magic is so ingrained in the philosophy of druidism’s that of course our neo’s have to keep up the tradition. Fortunately there is no spilling of blood and wand waving – it is simply realizing the potential of life and ideas into manifestations. Strangely disappointed with that.

Similarly to TCOS, N-D is based on pantheism – the belief that all life is interconnected and interdependent. Similarly to Buddhism is the belief in Karma and the laws of cause and effect. If I spend today doing Good Things, Good Things will happen to me. Is there anything particularly special or unique about neo-druidism then? Cos right now I’m not inspired. Oh right yes, RITUALS! After extensive ten-minute research I have discovered that contemporary druidic rituals can consist of meeting in the woods at specific time (what time I ask you?? Why am I asking you, I should ask the universe!), ritual consumption of beverages (apparently this is WHISKEY. Hahahaa! No fresh lambs blood for them!), chanting (learnt that yesterday) AND sacrifice. But, once again, no virgins or cute little animals. Oh no, neo-druids sacrifice vegetables.

I have nothing more to say on this matter.

Day 10 Breathe Deeply

So yesterday was a bit of a disaster. It would seem that spending the day trying to recognize the intrinsic good in people is largely incompatible with living in London. But regardless of yesterday, I do like agathism in a very general sense. It seems more palatable than pure optimism with it's absolute belief that things are great now... p'haps by acknowledging things aren't great now but they will be 'eventually', no matter how vague an entity 'eventually' - or the future - is, it effectively lessens the impact of the bad, en route. ARGH! Brain ache.

HOWEVER. Needing just a tiny pick me up, I stumbled across the immensely satisfying Akabusi Company. Yes, Kris Akabusi MBE. has rebranded himself as a motivational speaker. This intrigues me in many ways, not least that each time his name appears it is accompanied with MBE. Do you think he has an MBE? Do you? I'm not sure just yet but I'll let you know when I am. Added to which, there is the rather fantastic title 'Ambassador of Now'. This is brilliant. I would like to be Ambassador of Approximately AD 350 please. How did he get first dibs on Now?? Ahhh, Ambassador, how you spoil us with your slightly hysterical disposition and 'buzzwords'.

Made a hasty retreat from the website after reading: 'So come on and invite me to your party so that we can get Jiggy with it!'

Today's ism is: Buddhism

And would you adam'n'eve it (probs not, wrong religion), I stumbled cross this quote which ties in everything from yesterday, Kris MBE, and today:

"Past and Future are a duality of which Present is the reality. The now-moment alone is eternal and real"

Intrigued by this quote, I wanted to find out more about the man behind it - Wei Wu Wei (meaning action that is non-action) - and I was NOT expecting this! Wei Wu Wei is in fact Terence James Stannus Gray, born in Felixstowe, Suffolk in 1895. Incredible. Having dabbled in Egyptology (never a good thing for your sanity), the ballet, theatre, and breeding racehorses, Terence upped sticks, traveled around Asia, settled in Monaco and wrote a series of books about Eastern spirituality (drawing mostly from Buddhism and Taoism). I would never wish to cast aspersions as to Terence's state of mind, but his final book was written under the pseudonym O. O. O and consists entirely of a dialogue between an owl and rabbit.

Right, obviously I am not going to even begin to try and squeeze the entire nature and teachings of a 3000 year old religion into one day, so I will focus specifically on meditation. Recent scientific experiments have demonstrated that Buddhists experience more left prefrontal lobe activity (oh sorry! A Science Bit. And this time I'm depriving you of Aniston), something that ol' Doc Davidson of the University of Wisconsin attributes to the ability to tame the amygdala - a part of the brain involved with fear and anger

"Buddhists are not born happy. It is not reasonable to suppose that Tibetan Buddhists are born with a 'happiness gene'. The most reasonable hypothesis is there is something about conscientious Buddhist practice that results in the kind of happiness we all seek”.

Today is going to be about breathing (I should hope this is a part of everyone's day), clearing my mind of chaos, picking a mantra (?), and meditating.

Day 9 The Science Bit

I am in pure, unadulterated essay hell. Instead of the fun ‘isms’ I am surrounded by capitalism, Marxism, imperialism, postcolonialism. And quite frankly I am fed up with it. But DO NOT FRET I am still feeling wonderfully positive and in fact pretty happy that I succeeded at escapism. Of all the greatest escapes surely academia is up there with the best of them?!

However, because I like to do a thorough job of these day-missions, I have purchased an unhealthy amount of tabloid-esque magazines. As a result, I am well versed in the escapades of Cheryl and Ashley Cole, know precisely how our Tracy from Rotherham dropped three dress sizes in just as many days, and am completely ‘down’ with the various crimes against fashion in which poor celebs who probs just want to be sitting at home watching continuous episodes of Come Dine With Me are vilified for their WRONG choice of footwear. I know, I know, it’s drivel. But good drivel. AND, playing on insecurities of weight and fashion fuels capitalism, which is the marker within Marxism for the impetus for colonialism and indeed imperialism. Ta bloody da.

Which smoothly leads me on to today’s ism: Agathism.

This is, according to OED, “The doctrine that all things tend towards ultimate good, as distinguished from optimism, which holds that all things are now for the best”. And whilst we’re on the subject of dictionary definitions, I read this from agathism.com: “the agathist, less content with the present, nonetheless thinks things are inevitably tending towards good – ‘thought perhaps not’ as one dictionary explains, ‘along the best road’”

WHERE is this wonderfully subversive dictionary?! I want one.

SO, agathism lies somewhere between optimism and pessimism. Accepting that ‘evil’ exists and that bad things can happen to good people, it is all simply part of the process. Ultimately the road (the best road I ask you??) leads to Good Things. Ooh and humans are intrinsically Good People. Slightly suspicious of underlying religious ideology here but I get it.

Moving on... to quote the esteemed neurologist Jennifer Aniston, 'Here comes the science bit'

There is a strong neurological basis to all this - humans have an intrinsic ability to be positive and happy emotions stimulate specific parts of the brain. If a negative thought occurs, activity surrounding these parts is visibly reduced (visible on an MRI scan obvs, not with your own eyes you fool!) What is currently being explored is the concept that these parts of the brain can regenerate themselves based on your perception of the world now, regardless of a previous experience that might have caused intense negativity. This is pretty groundbreaking stuff if they achieve it and could do heaps for understanding depression. (Jus an ickle disclaimer - I am by no means a scientist and have a completely illogical brain, ergo... any mistakes with the above and quite simply I just don't care).

I guess at the heart of my ‘science bit’ is the fact that positivity is part of our wiring. I really like this - it's like optimism for realists. OH, and for one day only, THIS MAN might just be my soulmate.

Day 8 The Veritable Houdini

I am reluctant to move on from hedonism. Having enjoyed a day of ‘oh fuck it, it’s hedonism day’ I have consumed copious amounts of chocolate, wine, food, laziness, television. I’ve basically indulged my senses insofar as is doable with limited spends and an impending essay deadline… Oh yes, within my limits I was CRAZY!! I EVEN, yes – this is true (and led to one of my best friends declaring ‘I thought I knew you’), had a can of FULL FAT coke. Dear lordy I have sugar coursing through my veins. Such happiness.

I have been sent an abundance of ‘ism’ opportunities. I specifically would like to mention the following two: Resistentialism - the theory that inanimate objects display malice towards humans (brilliant) and Adamitism - the belief in being naked for religious reasons. Both equally amazing. The latter I’m sure would be much fun but not being religious and not particularly wanting to be naked during an English winter I’m gonna give it a miss (and I have to travel around London tomorrow and wish to do so without risking arrest).

So today, my third ism is… Escapism.

This is based on some kind of vague theory that the world in which we live is so jam-packed with stress, technology, and people who talk REALLY LOUDLY ON MOBILE PHONES ON PUBLIC TRANSPORT (I do not care to hear that you are indeed ON A BUS) that we are forced away from both our natural biological rhythms and What Really Matters in life. And blimey there is a heap of things on offer to distract from reality. ‘Healthy’ escapism refers to those little essentials in life... from watching mindless TV to celebrity magazines (I KNEW IT!! 5 continuous hours of Come Dine With Me and a back catalogue of Heat magazine is testament to something!) But escapism can be addictive, become extreme, and lead to all manner of craaazzzy obsessions like the preference of a virtual existence and virtual relationships from excessive Internet abuse. Stumbled across this little gem of a quote on a blog from user ‘anon61166’ Escapism is 'very healthy - the alternative is living a "normal" life, which, here in America, isn't very healthy or beneficial, to anyone'

Brilliant. Today, ladies and gents, I’m going to board that little cruise ship of delusion and sail away from reality. With looming deadlines this is all going to have to be Within Reason (eugh) so, to realistically escape I’m going to find my own little ways. This will no doubt involve at least one tabloid magazine and at least three episodes of The Dog Whisperer.

Day 7 ismismismismism

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief
that one's work is terribly important.
-Bertrand Russell

I have opened the great philosophical floodgates and am literally drowning in isms.

Last night, a friend suggested a day of hedonism. AMAZING. Absolutely bloody amazing. A day of indulging the senses I thought. But sweet mother of all things holy I truly am a product of the MTV generation...

Hedonism isn't quite what I thought it was. And fortunately I'm not alone in this misconception. A brief Google session later and I had been sold (not literally, unfortunately) a plethora of hedonistic holidays and experiences - whatever bordering-on-the-illegal services can be plastered on the internet. Perhaps my favourite is 'Hedonism Resorts - Notorious Adults Only, All-Inclusive Accommodations in Jamaica', who start casually with 'sleep in, stay up late, give up counting calories, give up mineral water' (???) and move swiftly onto 'pleasure comes in many forms. Choose one. Or two. Or more.' Err, enlighten me please, but what in all my glorious innocence am I choosing multiple quantities of?

Yep right, don't want to walk down that path. And without wanting to be so mind-numbingly dull in light of such abandoned pleasure, they misspell notorious on their website.

So rather predictably, hedonism is a philosophy from Ancient Greece. I knew it - those guys!! They completely mastered the art of Having a Good Time. Aristippus of Cyrene established an ultra-hedonist movement in the 4th century BC, teaching simply that pleasure and indulging the senses is the only source of intrinsic good. Fair dos, that's kind of what I had in mind. ALAS, no. Up steps party-pooper Epicurus and his self-titled Epicureanism (Rachelism??) asserting that yes, pleasure is still the only source of intrinsic good BUT this can be obtained through living a modest and virtuous life (tell that to the 'notorios'). He believed in an almost prudent asceticism that involved abstaining from physical desires. Squished by Christianity, hedonism lay dormant for several hundred years (I'm imagining a few secret wild societies) until Renaissance philosophers merged the two - Christianity and hedonism, not wild societies - and asserted that our desire for happiness should motivate us to behave morally. Finally, in more recent times, hedonism formed an integral part of utilitarianism, which in turn is part of consequentialism, and involves both ethical egoism or altruism (SEE WHAT I MEAN ABOUT ISMS. It's driving me insane).

Now essentially, I feel a little cheated by my naive concept of hedonism, and a little ashamed that I adhered much more to the philosophy of an adult-only hotel in northern Jamaica than the true history of the movement of hedonism. As with many things, it seems to have started off so pure (pure as in simple, not pure as in innocent... ancient Greeks were many things, but innocent they were not) and was put through the mangle of society (read religion) until it resembled whatever it was Those In Control wanted it to be. But at it's heart there is one of the best messages I've come across so far... whether it is indulging your senses or abstaining in the pursuit of a simple life, you should make yourself happy and yes this should be for your benefit but more that that, it should not harm anyone, not restrict anyone else from pursuing their own happiness, and should motivate altruistic behaviour to spread happiness. And that little gem is what I shall focus on today.

Day 6 The Week of Isms

I need to retract my sarcasm from yesterday. Having spent a (very hung over) day musing on a new perspective and ‘what would Pooh do?’ I’m ashamed to say I realized they’re both highly relevant and intriguing contenders for approaching life from a new angle. Who knew Pooh is Taoism personified (bearified?)?? Ok, probably quite a few people considering the success of Hoff’s book The Tao of Pooh. And Bond is a bit of a philosophers dream, representing everything from existentialism, Nietzsche’s Übermensch, going ‘beyond good and evil’, to Plato’s Guardian. None of which I’d particularly like, or even find realistic, to live my life by. But Taoism is attractive – and has inspired The Week of Isms.

Ism number one: Absurdism.

Always been fond of the word ‘absurd’. As I dragged my awkward limbs through teenage years, a key source of embarrassment was the rather archaic choice of words Dad chose to use. As a result, ‘absurd’, ‘ludicrous’, and ‘how much did that cost’ featured heavily.

The Danish philosopher Kierkegaard initially discussed absurdism in the 19^th century, forming an essential part of the existentialist movement. It's basically quite a depressing thought - the absurd refers to the dissonance between human search for meaning and the apparent meaningless nature of the universe. Picked up 100 years later by the rather suave Frenchman Albert Camus (if you squint when you look at the photo he could almost be James Dean, and trust me for a philosopher to even come close to that is A Rare Thing. Incredibly brainy they are, male models they are not). Camus decided, on closer examination, that in order to give life meaning in cold hard universe, you simply had to recognize the absurd. In recognition of this, you are free to create your own meaning.

I would like to point out here, and I can see this being a feature of The Week of Isms, that I am merely skimming the surface of what are painfully deep and complex philosophical musings that not only give me brain ache but, in light of this mission for Lent, detailed exploration of which isn't that applicable to finding a rule to live a day by.

Anyhow - essentially, my search for happiness and meaning is absurd but I'm going to carry on regardless and in doing so will create my own meaning. Actually, I quite like this. It's not imposing one objective meaning on life and although there is a disheartening futility to accepting we live in a world without purpose it is in turn saying life is a blank canvass, go forth and create a big messy painting that might mean bugger all to anyone else but as long as you find meaning in it, great work. It is, as with existentialism, ending with the belief we are all free.

Camus doesn’t view the concept of ‘life has no meaning’ as something to be sad about, rather something that should inspire a greater appreciation of being alive and being happy. So today I will accept the absurd, create my own meaning, and generally - in the face of a rain-soaked morning and nada but hard work ahead of me - enjoy being alive.

Day 5 BOOM.

“For many men, the acquisition of wealth does not end their troubles, it only changes them.”
“It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor.”
~ Seneca (5BC – AD65)

HOKAY – this is possibly controversial, but in light of the fact this newly forged road to positive enlightenment is partly motivated by the humiliating end of an all-round disaster of a relationship, I'm gonna indulge. For one day only.

I was at a party last night, as was The Ex and A New Girl. This is A Big Deal. Only, it wasn’t. It was most definitely and singularly the most liberating moment of the past year. As he stood there, concomitantly acting all ‘low-profile’ and yet radiating the usual self-worth, fingers intertwined with hers in front of my eyes, my initial reaction was very much run upstairs and cry, almost as some kind of deranged default setting of the last six months or so. Last night, alas, I couldn’t bear the thought of wasting such expensive make-up, and what a waste of time! It was a beautiful moment of realization to rise out of the wreckage. Not only do I now have exceptionally strong relationships with Those Who Have Picked Up The Pieces but I can recognize and hope to goodness avoid weak narcissistic personalities, covered by a thin and pathetic layer of falsified integrity.

BLIMEY, I’m going to write to Debs Mannering about this one. So, the point of saying all this is that despite Sundays being a ‘day off’ from Lent and therefore an opportunity pamper myself in a spa of cynicism, I’m not going to.

I found the positivityblog. It is updated on a regular basis by the rather cheery looking Henrik Edberg, a guru of self-improvement, health, happiness and (in his words) ‘general awesomeness a few times a week’. Ok, ok, I’ve taken that quote out of context, but I much prefer the thought of being generally awesome several times a week – no more, no less.

This, in my opinion, is pure genius:

3. What would someone else do?
This is a good way to find a new and more useful perspective. You simply ask yourself what someone else would do in your situation.
Maybe you ask yourself:
• What would Winnie the Pooh do?
• What would James Bond do?
• What would mom or dad do?
The point is to play around and find a new perspective and drag yourself out of your current negative, stressed and confused headspace and see things in another light. Just doing that can often help you to calm down, realize that this isn’t a huge deal and help you to find a solution that you can apply.

Is this for real??! Under normal circumstances, the thought of EVER assessing my behaviour against that of Winnie the Pooh and James Bond would force me to change my name to Sunshine and run away to Acapulco. TODAY however, my dearest, I am going to assess ALL of my behaviour against that of Winnie the Pooh and James Bond. Very much looking forward to this.

Day 4 la de da

"Well ding dong I'm happy with that" - Ian, Come Dine With Me. Series 3, Liverpool - Day 4.

This man, ladies and gentlemen, is Ramez Sassoon. What a photo. A veritable ball of charisma. Old Ram’ here has published a heap of books and put together this little nugget of a website: successconsciousness.com that I am trying VERY hard not to be skeptical about.

The aim of SuccessConsciousness is to ‘provide practical information and guidance to help people live a better, happier, and more fulfilling life, and achieve both material and spiritual success’. Ok… I’m going to allow myself one cynical comment – why mention materialism?? If you’re positive you will get the materialist possessions you desire. Eugh. It’s as brutal as lottery and credit card advertising. But that’s it isn’t it – it’s not about positive mental thinking for your own benefit, to feel more relaxed and lead a more positive life – it’s merely an extension of capitalism – to own material things you want (but don’t need) and to use the techniques ‘taught’ in websites like this to achieve success

So t’otherwise, I’m all game. Yes Ramez, I am looking for techniques to develop my inner and mental powers, guidance for self-improvement, positive thinking and indeed visualization (?). I’m fascinated that Ramez had to ‘give up his steady job’ to launch this website and I truly hope it’s paying off for him, both materially and spiritually.

So, my mission for today from SuccessConsciousness, , I am going to embrace :

A simple technique, consisting of watching how people behave and act in various situations and then looking inside myself to find out if I behave and act in the same way under the same conditions. When I see people with certain traits of character, or a certain kind of behaviour, that I do not like, I will examine myself to see whether I possess the traits too. If I do, I will visualize and rehearse in my mind a different sort of behaviour. When I encounter traits of character of behaviour that I like, I will think about their advantages and benefits and importance in my life.

Right, I have had to take great liberties editing this passage because Ramez is particularly fond of HAMMERING A POINT HOME over several paragraphs. I do like this – it’s basically self-awareness, insight and wanting to be a ‘better person’. Tonight, a friend asked why I was doing this - why not just be positive everyday? Yep of course that is the ultimate aim in the long term, but for these 40 days I am going all out... there is no room for negativity (Sunday exempt from this statement) and each day I need a mission statement from someone like Ramez, or Debs from Day 1 to focus on. And Saturday is 'Ramez Day'.

Oh and yesterday went very well– let’s be honest, getting back to basics is pretty easy and lots of fun. This week has been fantastically positive.

Day 3 of all things happy

Posting this tonight because won't have time tomorrow...

THIS picture of Lady Gaga cheered me up no end. And I would very much like to give thanks to all possible deities that my happiness research lead me to this woman: Barbara Ehrenreich

Ehrenreich released the book ‘Smile or Die: How Positive Thinking Fooled America and the World’ earlier this year and it is without doubt one of the most refreshingly subversive takes on popular philosophy (and it follows a back catalogue of similarly rebellious works).

I wanted to give up negative thinking for Lent but until now thought the whole positivity movement was superficial, lacking in substance and motivated by an underlying commercial gain. Misusing societal insecurities for financial profit. This is obviously entirely my opinion – there are countless stories online of how the positivity industry (as I shall now refer to it) has helped individuals through horrendous, life changing situations and that is something I would never wish to undermine. HOWEVER, for me personally, stumbling across Barbs is delightful.

In essence, she is against the ideology, or ‘mass delusion’ of positive thinking – the brainwashing of America that you should forever look on the bright side and as a consequence of not doing so berate yourself for feeling down. Barbs isn’t saying don’t feel positive or don’t try to be positive, simply don’t deny what you’re feeling. It’s a very pragmatic approach, and recognizes that the cult of individualism has had a detrimental impact on collective responsibility.

So it challenges the belief a positive attitude WILL lead to a positive life… and this is touching on so many philosophical foundations I’m going to stop thinking about it RIGHT NOW before my brain rots. One point I really want to focus on is from her blog, that happiness is an ‘inherently slippery thing to measure or define’. I’m at a tricky point now – the critical thinker in me says let's explore positive thinking from this perspective, with self-awareness and continuous questioning of methods used OR screw that and go naively and wholeheartedly into the rose tinted world of the positivity industry. What’s a girl to do to get happy?! Don’t answer that, I know what you’re thinking.

Without boring you with too much detail, being overly communicative paid off and I am now adjusting to permanent positivity pretty damn well. Minus a slight altercation with a bus driver it was another good day. Two major changes observed already – people around me seem to be responding well and that is awesomely motivating. Secondly, persistent happiness makes me persistently hungry. Clearly good moods burn more calories than wallowing.

Mission for today (again from Purica.com):
Get back to basics. Reconnect with old friends, take the dog for a walk, visit an art gallery or listen to your favourite music. Enjoy a long, relaxing bath, read a great book, tell your child a story, or ask an older relative to tell you one! The simplest things in life give us the most pleasure.

Well, I’ve reactivated my facebook account so that’s a start. I don’t have a dog, I haven’t got time to visit a gallery, and I don’t own a child (at least not as far as I’m aware). So, bath, books and… I’ll replace the others with Diet Coke, wine, chocolate, and laziness.

Day 2 of a sunny disposition

Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats. ~Voltaire

Is this seriously Voltaire? I don’t want to criticize quotes like this too much, because I know they can mean a lot to some people, but it does seem a tad lacklustre from one of the true polemicists of the Enlightenment… SORRY. Positive thinking. How true, Volt, I would be singing at the top of my voice whilst being sucked mercilessly into the whirlpool of a sinking ship. I hate communal singing. OMG STOP THIS. It’s still early days guys.

Yesterday was A. Good. Day. One slight hiccup - but good example of my mental ‘editing’ - with the receptionist at the Institute (In the box. IN THE BOX. PUT IT IN THE BOX. Trust me this is a long and boring story) but I put a positive spin on the confrontation and skipped merrily away (having put it in the PIGEON HOLE… correct place, smile, breathe deeply).

However… having mulled it over for a full day, I’m not that keen on the quote from yesterday. It strikes me as a tad superficial – a snappy little soundbite – almost an extension of the robotic, ubiquitous Americanism ‘Have a Nice Day’. But Americans do seem to have forged the road of positive thought, and motivational books, speakers, and workshops are a booming industry. Think and Grow Rich! by Napoleon Hill was published back in 1937, Norman Vincent Peale wrote The Power of Positive Thinking in 1952, and it seems between then and now – more so in more recent times - there is a plethora of self-help books designed to ultimately declare war on negative thoughts. It has become essential to the fabric of the American Dream. But I can’t shake how shallow it all seems. And the drivel. OH THE DRIVEL. I read this yesterday: “We share our invisible states of aliveness all the time” ??? I’m sorry? Say it like it is –miserable people make us feel miserable, happy people cheer us up.

Anyhoo, this is something I wish to explore further over my 40 days and it is (trust me) by no means an attack on American culture. I am fascinated by all this. For today the mission is:

Learn to communicate. Not saying the things we feel can lead to a sense of frustration, hurt, anger or anxiety. If you find communicating difficult, or are afraid of arguments or bruised feelings, take a course in communicating effectively always having the intent of non-harm.

Take a course? Ok… well, aside from that little nugget, here we go. Never had much of a problem communicating so feeling pretty confident about this. Perhaps should offer advance apologies to those with whom I am communicating, today could be somewhat illuminating.